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First of all, you need to know your daughter is not the first and certainly won't be the last teenager who disagrees with a visitation plan.
When Your Child Refuses Visitation
She is still a minor and it's in her best interest to have two parents in her life.
You could have someone else do the hand-offs, so that you and your ex are not together.
Description: The key to this conversation is to try to approach it like you and he are solving a problem together, not as if you are confronting him and this is not to say you aren't totally entitled to do so, but it's not going to be productive.